Friday, May 26, 2006

'Til Fame (or selfishness) Do Us Part

In the latest Ebony Magazine there is an article on the frequent break-up of celebrity couples entitled, The Hollywood Shuffle. The article raises and seeks to answer the question, "Why does it seem so difficult for celebrity marriages to last these day?" Well, I am not one fascinated with the rich and famous. I find that most people who are intrigued and idolize the lifestyles of the entertainment elite are those who are discontented with their own lives and wish to be like those they so idolize. I pray this is not you, but if it is, let me say that "Money can buy you love (for a moment), but it can't buy you marital fidelity." Marital bliss only comes through an understanding of the modus operandi of marriage. And this is what most marriages among the rich and famous lack. And what is the MO of marriage? It is humble-servanthood.
Make no mistake about it, a marriage in which the man and woman are finding fulfillment and happiness is the marriage in which each thinks more highly of the other than each thinks of him or herself. Humble servanthood is putting others before yourself. It is giving priority to the needs of others. It is sacrificing for the other, often at the expense of oneself. Without a doubt, if there is anything that is woefully missing among the Hollywood elite it is humility and servanthood. The entertainment rich and and famous may be called many things (some attractive and some not so attractive) but few, if any, could be called humble.
They live and breath in an atmosphere of egotism and narcissism. All around them reminds them of just how good and perfect they are. They are not use to serving because they spend the better part of their waking hours being served. On the set of movies or on stage at concerts, they are worshiped and waited on hand and foot. It is one thing, for one person in the relationship to live in this self-promoting, self-gratifying world, it is all together a recipe for marital disintegration when both live in that world. Because of this, celebrity marriages will always have a greater rate of failing than succeeding. But what should this say to those of less worldly importance? It says, "Take heed, lest we fall!"
I must be mindful that I am only a few selfish, self-glorifying, self-serving attitudes away from the slippery slope that is marital disaster. Biblical marriage is the only true marriage. Yes, non-Christians do marry and even have fulfilling marriages. But it is only because they have borrowed from God's manual on marriage, whether they realize it or not. Let those of us who are familiar with the Maker's instruction be foremost in heeding His words, and learn to serve more than be serve. So, let us love our spouses with a love that says to them,"My life and goals are only important in so much as they serve God's glory and your good."
"God's Glory and Your Good" - perhaps someone among the Hollywood elite will decide that is a good title for a movie. I know it is a good motto for marriage. Marriage is more important to God. Movies are more important to Hollywood. Which is most important to you?

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